Your First Visit to an Orthodox Church: Everything You Should Know

Most people who walk into an Orthodox church for the first time have been thinking about it for a while. Then the day comes, and the practical questions pile up. Which parish? What time do I actually arrive? Will everyone know I am new? Am I allowed to light a candle?

This guide covers the visit as a whole: finding a parish, getting through the door, the services you might walk into, and what happens afterwards. For a step-by-step explanation of the Sunday Eucharist itself, read our companion piece, What Happens During the Divine Liturgy? A Complete Beginner's Guide; we try not to repeat it here. Orthodox parishes share one faith and one order of worship, but customs differ between parishes and jurisdictions (Greek, Antiochian, Russian, Serbian, the Orthodox Church in America and others). Where practice varies, we say so.

In brief

A first visit to an Orthodox church is less complicated than it looks. Find a parish through a directory such as the one kept by the Assembly of Canonical Orthodox Bishops of the United States, check its service times, and if you can, tell the priest you are coming. Dress modestly. Arrive a little early: Sunday morning usually begins with Matins (Orthros) or the Hours before the Divine Liturgy. Inside, people light candles and kiss icons as they arrive; you may do the same or simply watch. Orthodox Christians stand for most of the service, but visitors may sit. If Sunday morning feels like too much, Saturday evening Vespers (or the All-Night Vigil in Russian-tradition parishes) is a gentler start. Holy Communion is for prepared Orthodox Christians, but in many parishes visitors may take the blessed bread at the end. Stay for coffee hour and meet the priest. Several parish guides say in writing that no one expects you to get everything right.

Thesis: Orthodox worship keeps very old Christian practices, and a visitor who knows what to expect at the door, during the services and afterwards can take part with confidence and without giving offense.

Why it looks the way it does: a little history

Much of what surprises newcomers is old. Orthodox Christians count the liturgical day from sunset, following Genesis: "So the evening and the morning were the first day" (Genesis 1:5, NKJV). Fr. Thomas Hopko's handbook for the Orthodox Church in America explains that "the liturgical day begins in the evening with the setting of the sun," which is why Saturday evening Vespers is the first service of Sunday.¹

At every Vespers, incense is offered while Psalm 141 (140 in the Septuagint) is sung: "Let my prayer be set before You as incense, the lifting up of my hands as the evening sacrifice" (Psalm 141:2, NKJV). The hymn that follows, "O Gladsome Light," was already old in the mid-370s, when St. Basil the Great wrote On the Holy Spirit. {{very-strong: Basil describes Christians giving thanks "at the lighting of the lamps" with words whose author was already unknown in his day.}} In the Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers translation: "Who was the author of these words of thanksgiving at the lighting of the lamps, we are not able to say. The people, however, utter the ancient form."²

The candles have a history too. The Seventh Ecumenical Council (Nicaea II, 787) taught that icons should receive "due salutation and honourable reverence," not "that true worship of faith which pertains alone to the divine nature," and that "incense and lights may be offered according to ancient pious custom."³ The candle a parishioner lights on the way in is that offering of light.

Before you go

Finding a parish

In the United States, the simplest starting point is the parish directory of the Assembly of Canonical Orthodox Bishops. You can search by distance and filter by jurisdiction; it calls itself "a single online directory of all parishes" kept by "the member jurisdictions."⁴ Individual churches keep their own lists as well, such as the Orthodox Church in America's directory by state and diocese.⁵ A canonical directory has a second benefit. Some groups use the name "Orthodox" without belonging to any canonical Orthodox Church; answering a reader's question about one, the OCA's website warns, "There are dozens of groups such as this, many of which exist only on paper or in cyberspace."⁶ If you are unsure, ask which bishop a parish belongs to and check the directory.

The many ethnic names can look like many churches. Frederica Mathewes-Green, a convert and writer, puts it plainly in her well-known guide for newcomers: "All these Orthodox churches are one church." The ethnic name "identifies which bishops hold authority there."⁷ For the wider family of churches, see our Christianity family tree. Language matters more than jurisdiction for a first visit: some parishes serve largely in Greek, Church Slavonic, Arabic or another language, many entirely in English. Mathewes-Green advises: "Visiting several Orthodox parishes will help you learn where you're most comfortable."⁸

Checking the schedule

Look at the parish calendar rather than relying on a sign. Mathewes-Green notes that the Liturgy "is preceded by an hour-long service of Matins (or Orthros)," that "there is no break between these services," and that "posted starting times are just educated guesses."⁹ A small mission of the Russian Orthodox Church Outside of Russia (ROCOR) in Alabama lists the Hours twenty minutes before its 10:00 Liturgy.¹⁰ A short email to the priest beforehand is not required, but it lets him look out for you.

What to wear

Dress modestly, as for a formal occasion, and skip shorts. Expectations vary more here than anywhere else. An OCA parish in Pennsylvania, in its posted version of Fr. David Barr's etiquette guide, says that for men "coat and tie are not mandatory" and allows women dress pants.¹¹ The Alabama mission, which keeps stricter customs, invites non-Orthodox women visitors "to wear a headscarf and a skirt," asking at least for modest dress.¹² A scarf in your bag will fit almost anywhere. Go easy on lipstick, since people kiss icons, the cross and the priest's hand.

Arriving: the door, the candles and the icons

Most Orthodox churches have an entrance area, the narthex, where candles are kept and where parishioners may write the names of the living and the departed for the priest to pray for. The Alabama mission's guide tells its members to "buy any candles or write names on proskomedi slips" before entering the church itself.¹³

You may light a candle too, with a short prayer for someone. One rule is worth knowing. Barr's guide, first published in 1997 in The Word, the magazine of the Antiochian Archdiocese, and since posted in adapted versions by many parishes, says candles should not be lit during "the Epistle or Gospel readings, during the Little or Great Entrances, during the Anaphora, and during the homily."¹⁴ If everyone is standing very still, wait.

You will see people crossing themselves, bowing and kissing icons. Mathewes-Green admits this "can seem like secret-handshake stuff that you are sure to get wrong," then adds, "Don't worry, you don't have to follow suit."¹⁵ If you do venerate an icon, Barr asks that you kiss the Gospel book, scroll or hand cross held by the person depicted, or the hand or foot, not the face.¹⁶ On the Orthodox way of crossing oneself, see The Sign of the Cross in the Early Church.

Where to stand, and whether to sit

In some churches men and women stand on separate sides. Valamo Monastery in Finland explains: "Traditionally, men position themselves on the right side of the church when viewed from the door, and women on the left."¹⁷ Many parishes do not keep this custom. Watch what others do.

Standing is the normal posture, and some churches have no pews at all, but visitors may sit. Mathewes-Green writes that if the standing is too much, "you're welcome to take a seat. No one minds or probably even notices."¹⁸ Even the Alabama mission tells non-Orthodox visitors, "You may sit the entire service if you prefer."¹⁹ If you want to stand at the key moments, Barr's rule of thumb is easy to remember: "When in doubt, stand."²⁰

Which service will you find?

Many first-time visitors only know about Sunday morning, but the evening services can be an easier start.

Service	When	What to expect
Vespers (Great Vespers on Saturday)	Evening, often Saturday	Shorter than Sunday morning. Evening psalms, "Lord, I call upon Thee" with incense, "O Gladsome Light," and hymns of the Resurrection on Saturdays. No Communion.
All-Night Vigil	Saturday evening	Vespers and Matins joined into one longer service, which Hopko says is done "particularly in churches of the Russian tradition."
Matins (Orthros) and the Hours	Sunday morning, before the Liturgy	Psalms and hymns (on Sundays, of the Resurrection), a Gospel reading on Sundays and feasts, the Canon and the Great Doxology. People drift in during it.
Divine Liturgy	Sunday morning and feast days	The Eucharist, about ninety minutes, almost all sung.

The descriptions of Vespers and Matins follow Hopko's handbook.²¹ A Saturday Vespers lets you hear the music and meet the priest without the crowd and length of Sunday morning.

During the Liturgy: two things to know

Communion. Holy Communion is given to baptized Orthodox Christians who have prepared for it, and non-Orthodox visitors are asked not to come forward. The reason is unity, not judgment. Mathewes-Green explains that receiving "acknowledges faith in historic Orthodox doctrine, obedience to a particular Orthodox bishop, and a commitment to a particular Orthodox worshipping community." She adds, "There's nothing exclusive about this; everyone is invited to make this commitment to the Orthodox Church."²² The Liturgy guide sets out the reasoning more fully.

The blessed bread. At the end, people come forward to kiss the cross held by the priest and take a piece of bread from a basket. This is the antidoron, blessed but not consecrated. A Greek Orthodox parish in Ohio invites visitors "to receive the antidoron bread at the conclusion of the service."²³ Practice varies, and some parishes keep it for Orthodox or baptized Christians. If it is offered to you, you may accept it; if you are unsure, watch. If you are handed a piece to share, Barr suggests taking an extra piece "rather than break yours in half."²⁴

Afterwards: coffee hour and the priest

Many parishes gather after the Liturgy for coffee hour. Barr calls it "the best place to visit," as opposed to chatting during the service.²⁵ If you can stay, stay. This is where your questions get answered.

The priest is addressed as "Father." Orthodox Christians greet him by asking his blessing: Barr describes approaching with "your right hand over your left hand" and saying "Father, bless," after which the priest blesses you and you kiss his hand.²⁶ Visitors are not expected to do this; a handshake and a thank-you are fine. If you are thinking about the Orthodox Church more seriously, tell him. The Ohio parish's guide says the first step is "to make your interest known to the priest," who "will discuss your religious background and spiritual needs with you."²⁷ That usually leads, in time, to the catechumenate, a period of learning before baptism or chrismation. Nobody will ask you to sign up on your first Sunday.

Honest questions visitors ask

"Will I offend someone if I get it wrong?"

Probably not. The Pennsylvania parish's version of Barr's guide tells first-time visitors, "do not worry about getting everything right! You are our guests."²⁸ The Alabama mission, the strictest of the parishes quoted here, warns its own members against becoming "enforcers of church etiquette" and asks them to greet newcomers "warmly and politely."²⁹

"If I kiss an icon, am I worshipping it?"

Many Protestant visitors feel this sharply, and for a serious reason: the commandment against carved images (Exodus 20:4-5) is plain, and many Protestants read it as ruling out the religious veneration of images. The Orthodox answer comes from the Seventh Council, which distinguished "honourable reverence" from the "true worship" owed to God alone, and taught that "the honour which is paid to the image passes on to that which the image represents."³⁰ Orthodox Christians kiss an icon of Christ as one might kiss the photograph of someone loved, because of the person. You are not asked to do it. Our guide to icons and relics takes up the biblical arguments.

"Nobody spoke to me. Is this an ethnic club?"

Orthodox writers admit it can feel that way. Mathewes-Green writes, "I wish it could be said that every local parish eagerly welcomes newcomers," and explains that some parishes, still close to their immigrant roots, are puzzled that outsiders are interested at all.³¹ That is a fault, not a teaching. Try coffee hour, speak to the priest, or try another parish.

"I am Catholic (or Protestant). Is it wrong for me to be here?"

Orthodox parishes welcome visitors of every background, and you are not asked to do anything against your conscience. You can pray the Lord's Prayer, listen to the Scriptures and simply be present. Whether attending fits your own church's discipline is a question for your conscience and your pastor. For a fair comparison of the two styles of worship, see Why Orthodox Worship Feels So Different from Protestant Worship.

What we can say confidently

• Visitors are welcome, and parish guides from several jurisdictions say visitors need not follow every custom.
• Sunday morning usually begins with Matins (Orthros) or the Hours, and the liturgical day begins with Vespers the evening before.
• The Vespers hymn "O Gladsome Light" was already ancient when St. Basil wrote in the mid-370s.
• The Seventh Ecumenical Council (787) approved lights and incense before icons and distinguished their veneration from the worship owed to God alone.
• Holy Communion is given only to prepared Orthodox Christians.

What varies from parish to parish

• Dress expectations, especially head coverings and skirts for women.
• Whether there are pews, and whether men and women stand on separate sides.
• Whether non-Orthodox visitors are offered the antidoron.
• The language of the services, and whether Saturday evening has Vespers or the All-Night Vigil.

Conclusion

When Nathanael doubted that anything good could come from Nazareth, "Philip said to him, 'Come and see'" (John 1:46, NKJV). That is still the best invitation. You do not have to understand every gesture before you walk in. Pick a parish, check the time, dress modestly, and go. Light a candle if you like, stand when you can, sit when you need to, and stay for coffee. The Church that was already singing "O Gladsome Light" at lamp-lighting in St. Basil's day will be glad to see you.

Notes

1. Thomas Hopko, The Orthodox Faith, vol. 2, Worship, "Vespers" (Orthodox Church in America), online at oca.org.
2. Basil the Great, On the Holy Spirit 29.73, trans. Blomfield Jackson, NPNF2 vol. 8 (New Advent).
3. Second Council of Nicaea (787), Decree, NPNF2 vol. 14, ed. Henry R. Percival (New Advent).
4. Assembly of Canonical Orthodox Bishops of the United States of America, "Directory of Orthodox Christian Parishes," assemblyofbishops.org.
5. Orthodox Church in America, "Parishes" directory, oca.org/parishes.
6. Orthodox Church in America, "Orthodox or Not?" Questions & Answers, oca.org.
7. Frederica Mathewes-Green, "First Visit to an Orthodox Church: 12 Things I Wish I'd Known," no. 12 (text as reproduced at azbyka.ru).
8. Mathewes-Green, "12 Things," no. 12.
9. Mathewes-Green, "12 Things," no. 1.
10. St. Elizabeth the New Martyr Orthodox Church (ROCOR mission), Cullman, Alabama, "Church Etiquette" page (service listing) and "Our Parish" page.
11. David Barr, "A Guide to Church Etiquette," The Word (January 1997), 4-7, as posted in adapted form by Christ the Saviour Orthodox Church (OCA), Harrisburg, Pennsylvania.
12. St. Elizabeth, Cullman, "Church Etiquette."
13. St. Elizabeth, Cullman, "Church Etiquette."
14. Barr, "A Guide to Church Etiquette," "Lighting Candles."
15. Mathewes-Green, "12 Things," no. 3.
16. Barr, "Venerating Icons."
17. Valamo Monastery, "Orthodox customs," valamo.fi.
18. Mathewes-Green, "12 Things," no. 2.
19. St. Elizabeth, Cullman, "Church Etiquette."
20. Barr, "Standing vs. Sitting."
21. Hopko, The Orthodox Faith, vol. 2, "Vespers" and "Matins"; on people arriving during Matins, Mathewes-Green, "12 Things," no. 1; on the length and singing of the Liturgy, no. 8.
22. Mathewes-Green, "12 Things," no. 6.
23. Ron Guthrie, "A Visitor's Guide to the Divine Liturgy," Assumption Church of the Blessed Virgin (Greek Orthodox Metropolis of Detroit), Springfield, Ohio.
24. Barr, "Handling the Holy Bread."
25. Barr, "Talking During Church."
26. Barr, "Kiss (Don't Shake) the Priest's or Bishop's Hand."
27. Guthrie, "A Visitor's Guide," "How do I become an Orthodox Christian?"
28. Barr, "A Guide to Church Etiquette," introduction to the Christ the Saviour (Harrisburg) posting.
29. St. Elizabeth, Cullman, "Church Etiquette," introduction.
30. Second Council of Nicaea, Decree, NPNF2 vol. 14.
31. Mathewes-Green, "12 Things," no. 12.

Bibliography

Primary sources

• Basil the Great. On the Holy Spirit. Trans. Blomfield Jackson. Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers, Second Series, vol. 8. Ed. Philip Schaff and Henry Wace. Buffalo, NY: Christian Literature Publishing Co., 1895. Online at New Advent: https://www.newadvent.org/fathers/3203.htm
• Second Council of Nicaea (787). The Decree. Nicene and Post-Nicene Fathers, Second Series, vol. 14. Ed. Henry R. Percival. Online at New Advent: https://www.newadvent.org/fathers/3819.htm
• The Holy Bible, New King James Version. Nashville: Thomas Nelson, 1982 (Genesis 1:5; Psalm 141:2; John 1:46).

Orthodox and patristic sources

• Hopko, Thomas. The Orthodox Faith, vol. 2, Worship. Orthodox Church in America. "Vespers": https://www.oca.org/orthodoxy/the-orthodox-faith/worship/the-daily-cycle/vespers ; "Matins": https://www.oca.org/orthodoxy/the-orthodox-faith/worship/the-daily-cycle/matins
• Mathewes-Green, Frederica. "First Visit to an Orthodox Church: 12 Things I Wish I'd Known." Reproduced at https://azbyka.ru/otechnik/world/first-visit-to-an-orthodox-church-12-things-i-wish-i-d-known/
• Barr, David. "A Guide to Church Etiquette." The Word, January 1997, 4-7. Posted in adapted form by Christ the Saviour Orthodox Church (OCA), Harrisburg, PA: https://christthesaviourhbg.org/churchetiquette
• Guthrie, Ron. "A Visitor's Guide to the Divine Liturgy." Assumption Church of the Blessed Virgin, Springfield, OH: https://assumption.oh.goarch.org/visitors/visitors-guide
• St. Elizabeth the New Martyr Orthodox Church (ROCOR mission), Cullman, AL. "Church Etiquette": https://cullman.orthodoxws.com/church-etiquette ; "Our Parish": https://cullman.orthodoxws.com/ourparish
• Valamo Monastery. "Orthodox customs": https://valamo.fi/en/monastery/divine-services/orthodox-customs
• Assembly of Canonical Orthodox Bishops of the United States of America. "Directory of Orthodox Christian Parishes": https://www.assemblyofbishops.org/directories/parishes/
• Orthodox Church in America. "Parishes": https://www.oca.org/parishes
• Orthodox Church in America. "Orthodox or Not?" Questions & Answers: https://www.oca.org/questions/otherconfessions/orthodox-or-not